The LushDates.com online safety guidelines below have been put
together to help you avoid uncomfortable situations and other problems.
Keep your anonymity.
TAKE YOUR TIME, and ask lots of questions. Don't give out any personal
information, including your email address. Use our internal mailing
system, which allows you to send and receive mail without using
your real address. Get a good idea of what a person may be like
before you give them your email address. You can set up free email
accounts through services such as Yahoo, Hotmail, and others. Never
give out your last name, home address, phone number, work information,
or any other identifying information in your profile or initial
emails. Don't communicate with anyone who attempts to pressure you
into giving this information. Simply ignore them.
Use common sense and be cautious.
Don't believe everything you read or are told. Watch out for a person
who is simply too good to be true. Watch closely for odd behaviour,
the person may not be what he or she says. You're responsible to
take all the time you need to make sure a person is honest and trustworthy.
If you suspect a person is lying, they very likely are. Don’t
get hurt by becoming prematurely intimate with someone. Don't be
in a rush to fall in love, it will happen when it happens.
Ask for a photo.
A photo will verify a person's profile information and give you
a good idea of appearance. If you keep getting excuses from someone
who won’t provide a photo, it is probable that he or she is
trying to hide something. Our site will scan in a photo for free,
so there really aren't any good excuses for not doing it. A person
may also send you a photo of somebody else. Be cautious.
Use the telephone. (A pay phone at first)
At the right time, a phone call will tell you many things about
a person’s ability to communicate. Keep your number anonymous
if possible, and use the conversation to find out more about the
person to make sure you want to meet. Also call a co-worker, a friend,
or a family member. The more people you talk to, the safer and more
sure you will be. Only share your phone number when you feel absolutely
sure about trusting the person. If you are being pressured to meet,
ask to speak to the person’s mother first.
Meet only when you are ready.
Try to be patient. One of the wonderful things about meeting somebody
online is that you can gain so much information about a person before
you feel you need to meet. You have NO obligation to meet anyone,
ever. Stay away from people that make you uncomfortable.
Behaviour such as anger, demeaning or disrespectful comments, physically
inappropriate comments and behaviour, intense frustration or attempts
at pressuring or controlling you are obvious warning signs. Stay
away from people like this; just ignore them. Watch for the following
- If information about age, interests, appearance, marital status,
profession, employment, and other information is inconsistent.
- If they will not speak to you on the phone after establishing
an ongoing relationship.
- If they are evasive and will not directly answer questions.
- If there is a difference from his or her online profile.
- If they will not introduce you to friends, professional associates
or family members.
Meeting the first time.
Choose the safest possible environment. Even if you think you know
every detail about a person and you trust them implicitly, meet
in public where many people are around. Also, tell someone where
you are going and when you will be back. Use your own transportation
to get to and from the date. Go somewhere very familiar to you.
Be brief, one or two hours is plenty. You will have plenty of time
for longer dates. If your date disagrees with this guideline or
any of the guidelines listed here, you shouldn't meet that person.
Travelling to meet someone.
Always use your own transportation. Don't allow your date to make
the arrangements. If the location where you are meeting seems unsafe,
awkward, or inappropriate - go back home or to your hotel. And of
course, make sure a friend or family member knows your plans and
has your contact information. Take a mobile phone with you if you
If in doubt.
Just leave. Its always better to be safe than sorry. Your safety
is obviously more important than worrying about embarrassment, your
behaviour, or what another person may think of you. Just leave.